Just now I read this text [see below] to realize that there is another way of looking at your behaviour. And that is to RECOGNIZE that in stress situations you behave like you have learned. The key question ... Who are you acting out!
Becoming aware! To notice this is happening is yet another way of becoming who you really are. Congruent with yourself in every aspect of life.
A Surprise Insight: 1987
I was stressed and tired at the time. Michael, my six year old had teased me just one too many times. I was ready to snap. Then it happened. He did it again. My small frame grew tight and taut, my shoulders raised, I turned sharply, loomed up into what must have seemed like a monster to a small child, arm poised ready to strike. I didn't.
In an instant something happened, I could see myself as if I was standing in front of a mirror. (Grinder 1995) Who was I? I had turned the clock back; I was my father, angry, being physically threatening. Michael was me as a child, shaking hovering, fearful, wide-eyed and innocent, what have I done? My body slumped; tears fell from my face. Instead of hitting my son, I drew him gently to my body and hugged him, sobbing.